Dirty Diana

By Juan Cristobal Nagel - Caracas Chronicles

Before Hugo Chávez came to power, Venezuela had its share of prestigious legislators.

People like Carmelo Lauría, Luis Enrique Oberto, Gustavo Tarre, Argelia Laya, Haydeé Castillo, and Oswaldo Álvarez Paz – to name a few – made careers for themselves out of their hard work in Parliament. Some of them even got to be Presidents of the Chamber of Deputies.

Our Congreso Nacional had its political celebrities, but not once did I ever hear of a “first lady of Parliament.” Never. Not even in the worst days of chavismo.

None of these legendary politicians ever tried to make their roles in Congress more than what they really were. Congress is not the Executive, and there are no first ladies.

That is why the revealing cover photo of Diana D’Agostino, the wife of Henry Ramos Allup currently gracing the front page of a glossy local rag, is so disturbing.

Put aside the fact that Diana looks regal in a house that no Venezuelan – least of all an until-recently-unemployed politician such as her husband – could plausibly afford, did Diana ever stop to think that we are wasting precious newsprint … on this? El Nacional is down to a page and a half, there is no toilet paper in the country, but the Editorial Board of OK! seems to be doing … better than OK!

What. Was. She. Thinking?

Mrs. D’Agostino was previously known simply as the sister to some of Venezuela’s most notorious enchufados. Now, she’s calling herself something that does not exist. You would think that a proper sense of decorum, a tiny hint of the ginormicous rabo-de-paja this lady brings with her would prompt her to, pstt, de pana, lay low.

But no. Laying low is simply not in the D’Agostino’s DNA – and if you don’t believe me,check this out.

This trophy-wive-ismo on steroids-and-botox is the wrong kind of message the opposition should be sending. The country is going down the tubes, but check out Diana’s teeth! Cancer patients cannot find medicines, but Diana can sure find a hefty supply of Igotint!

And let’s not even mention how the magazine informs us of all the “projects” Diana will lead from Parliament – as if she had been elected to lead anything. The road to hell … is probably paved with Diana’s projects.

Mrs. D’Agostino’s desperate PR ploy to clean her family’s name is disgusting. Her attempts to make herself the queen of an imaginary kingdom are sad.

Lady, ubíquese.

Have a great weekend everyone!